Real Women Want Real Men

Quarantine has made me think a lot about a lot of the things that matter.

When you are on quarantine you get to have real deep conversations  with the people who hold you down. That's when something  struck me clear as day.


Neyo was on to something when he wrote the words:

Cause she work like a boss, play like a boss / Car and a crib, she 'bout to pay them both off/ And her bills are paid on time, yeah/ She's made for a boss, only a bossAnything less she's telling them to get lost

Women get to a certain point in their life when they realize that jokers no longer need apply. We don't want to be your therapist or your bridge to the next best thing. We want to support you and have you honestly support us.

Before we even get there, you need to know that women want the love of real men. Not men wanting to be fly with their pants on their thighs and no belt on their waist. We don't want you to sit in front of a video game for hours on end. We don't want the video game in the bedroom either. Please don't tell me that's how you unwind. Not buying it.

No, let's not Netflix and chill. That is not a date. As a matter of fact it is cheap and lazy excuse to get in to my house and do nothing. You want to watch Netflix and chill? Do it at your house. I want us to have a conversation over dinner.

Speaking of which, I have had many of my friends tell me how guys no longer want to pay for a date? Drinks and bar food is not a date. It's an opportunity to hang out. I promise I am going to come back to that later in another blog post.

Let's go back to the whole fashion thing first.

Want to know the sexiest clip I saw in the last few months?

Here it is:

This is what we want to see more of. Trust me when I say I am not alone on this.

I know as a woman I am tired of seeing the pants on the waist thing. I am tired of hats inside. Want to wear a hat?  Fine. How about a fedora? How about a dress hat? Why don't guys dress up anymore? Why are we looking at grown men dressed in teen gear?  I am tired of these gangly, uncombed, gruesome beards and over-sized athletic shirts and hoodies. Why do men no longer want to look groomed? Did I miss something?  The best thing to come out of IGTV was "Don't Rush" Challenge. It was refreshing to see people cleaned up.

Speaking of  Instagram.  Instagram flirting is horrible. The damage that dating apps has done to the way we organically connect with people is belittling and disrespectful.  Sending pics  of yourself unwanted is distasteful. Please note we are appalled. While it’s fair to say that there has always been an element of superficiality to dating, dating apps have changed the way we interact with what’s beneath the surface. What’s more is that we prioritize perceived compatibility—attributes of a person that seem like they fit with our own personalities and lives—rather than how someone makes us feel.

Marriage rates have hit historic lows, dating apps are apparently making users depressed, and men appear to be in a full-blown masculinity crisis. Men who berate women and call them feminists if they pay, but if they accept the man’s offer to buy dinner then they are labeled gold diggers.

Listen, my friends don't need you to pay their bills.  We all  think dinner would be nice because quite frankly, we would like conversation with someone of the opposite sex that is not linked to us hooking up immediately after.

I will say to all my single sisters out there the following: A man who comes along who is confident and secure with himself will support and appreciate you and your goals. I know that. I believe that.

We need to step up and put more effort into communication, courtship, and just bonding with other human beings in general.  Courtship.. look it up. It matters.

Gentlemen, there are sophisticated, educated, together women who would love to date you if you just stepped up.   They are  classy, well dressed smart queens. 

Look for one. She is likely to be the best  thing to happen in your life.