Self Love Is Important

Self-Love is critical for happiness in your life for many reasons. Self-love is defined as a deliberate act that you make in order to provide care and compassion for yourself, first and foremost. Many people think of self-love as a day at the spa or a bubble bath…. but self-love means so much more than that.
On a deeper level, self- love includes having a higher regard for your own well-being. Self-love looks like trusting yourself, asserting boundaries and an overall deeper connection to yourself, which in turn can connect you with others. Self-love can also include talking kindly to oneself or prioritizing rest when you need it. 

It can be challenging to understand how important loving yourself is…. however, even more challenging is what can happen when you don’t offer self-love. Your happiness is dependent on how you take care of yourself and self-love has been linked to increased resilience and capacity to see things from a new perspective. When you put yourself last or fail to love yourself, you will notice increased stress, anxiety and reactivity to the little things that you may have ignored beforehand. Things will feel more difficult, overwhelming and lead to you feeling depleted and overall, more unhappy.
Here is where you start.

#1. To Liberate Yourself from Comparisons
Who do you compare yourself to and why? When we compare ourselves to others, it is a total and utter set up for failure. Why? People who truly love themselves realize that comparison doesn’t feel good… ever… yet sometimes, they continue to do it. Teddy Roosevelt once said “Comparison is the thief of joy” … and he’s absolutely right!! How many times have you been scrolling through social media and seen an acquaintance bragging about their “perfect” life?
The beautiful house, the car, the happy perfect family… Well, what you don’t know is that on the inside, that family may be doing their own family therapy, and they are about to lose their home and it’s creating stress and arguments. In fact, they just signed up for marital therapy too and they are actually considering divorce and haven’t had sex in a year. The lesson is, what’s on the outside may not be what’s really going on behind the scenes… and it’s okay… but here we are comparing our life to their “perfect picture”, feeling envious… and also feeling worse than an hour ago, before we started scrolling. 

#2 To Live Life in Alignment to Values
What are your values? Are they family? Friends? Success? Kindness? Are you living in alignment with your values? If you are not practicing self-love, it is highly probable that one or more areas in these categories are slipping. For instance, your “family” value may not be aligned in the life you are living because you lack self-love. You may notice you have a hard time being present with your family and are missing the special moments, or you just don’t have the energy for them. Or perhaps your value is kindness, however, you have been increasingly irritated or easy to react… and cannot be kind right now… Why? Because you are running on empty and everyone is getting your love, except you.

#3 Maintain Healthy Relationships

Whether its friends, family or a romantic relationship, self-love enhances these relationships. In essence, we teach others how to treat us. If we don’t have self-love or self-respect, we may notice others feel they have the greenlight to disrespect us too. Through self-love, you set the standard of how you will accept being treated in any relationship. Sometimes when we are treated poorly, we must examine our own self-love. How strong are your boundaries with others? Are you a “people pleaser”?

Self-love can seem like a hard behavior to begin… and where to even start? It can seem selfish to put yourself first and to set standards in your life that work for you. However, implementing self-love can enhance various parts of your life and is critical to increasing your overall happiness. It is entirely possible to live a healthy, happy and fulfilling life with the addition of self-love. Choose self-love, unapologetically, and learn to release the guilt holding you back and keeping you unhappy. Truly loving yourself is the direct path to a happier life.